Fill in the Blank and Funny Friday

Yay, it's FRIDAY :) and that means it's time for Lauren's Fill in the Blank Friday AND Kelly's Funny Fridays... make sure to join in the fun too :)

Fill in the blank..

1. The best day ever was the day I got married. I know it sounds cheesy, but it's so true. Not only was I marrying my best friend and getting ready to start our lives together, but I got to spend the day celebrating with all of the my wonderful family and friends.

2. My favorite meal of the day is dinner because on a week night it means the work day is over and it's time to relax with the hubby and on weekends it means we're going out to eat ;) 

3. This weekend amy and I are finally getting our tattoos.. don't worry there will be pictures later..

4. Never in my life have I done anything crazy like bungee jumping or ski diving.. BUT at some point I would really like to try doing both!

5. The only thing better than it finally being the weekend is it being a weekend with Amy visiting ;-)

6. I could really do with some extra sleep right now. Vince and I stayed up late watching a movie last night and now I am totally regretting that decision... haha.

7. The most recent thing I bought myself was this cute dress from Kohl's last week.

Funny Friday


Ok for this weeks funny Friday.. I got this email that literally made me laugh out loud at work so I thought I would share..

Disorder in the American Courts

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

***
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

***
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

***
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?

***
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes..
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS : Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

***
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male

***
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.

***
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.


OK.. sorry that was so long, but you have to admit they were pretty funny!

Happy Friday :)